“If you live today you breathe in nihilism. In or out of the Church, it’s the gas you breathe.” ~ Flannery O’Connor, August 28, 1955

“Nihilism; a doctrine or belief that conditions in the social organization are so bad as to make destruction desirable for its own sake independent of any constructive program or possibility.” ~ Merriam-webster.com

So the question I pose today is: Is nihilistic motherhood the new norm? In a word, no. At least for me, and, I believe many of you reading this, because if you are on my mailing list you most likely agree that motherhood is love, sacrifice, joy, exhaustion, heartache, and delight all mixed into a sacred ball. 

I recently saw an advertisement for a movie called “Die My Love”, released earlier this month and it got me curious. The premise follows a young woman who struggles with her mental state after moving into a rural home with her partner and giving birth to their baby. While he works outside the home, seemingly oblivious to her rapid downward spiral, she rips wallpaper from the walls with her bare hands, licks a window pane, pours soap on the floor,  paces, crawls, throws things, screams and generally unravels. Very obviously signs of postpartum depression. Which is one of the film’s themes. It is a heartbreaking portrayal of motherhood. Fictional? Yes. Realistic? Somewhat. Concerning? Most certainly. Grace’s fate is rather ambiguous and I won’t spoil the ending for you. 

It got me recalling some other recent films that also explored the “underbelly” of motherhood and boy was it bleak. 

“Nightbitch” (pardon my language) a 2021 novel, made into film, centers around “the struggle for a woman to retain her identity as an artist after becoming a stay-at-home mother.” (sheknows.com, A. Kelly, 11/7/25) So overwhelmed with exhaustion, isolation, and the “loss of self”, the protagonist, an unnamed woman referred to by her husband as “see film title”, begins to physically transform into a dog as a response to her growing frustrations. Her descent into rage is depicted, fantasy-like, by extreme acts of violence towards herself and the neighborhood animals. Ok then.

And finally, a film called, “If I had legs I’d kick you,” released this year, centers around another mother, with another young child, married but whose partner is “mostly” working, and in this case, the mother also has a career, and the slow cycle into disorder, isolation, and ultimately a mental breakdown. 

Couple thoughts, yes, it’s Hollywood and Hollywood is known for its seeming distaste for motherhood, but that’s not my point. 

Postpartum depression is very real. According to postpartumdepression.org; PPD affects 1 in 5 women and a staggering 50% of women struggling with PPD either do not or cannot seek care. Today’s average PCP is not properly equipped to diagnose and help treat this form of mental and emotional depression. 

Places like Next Step Pregnancy Services are working towards being able to offer more robust resources and support for this heartbreaking disorder but its not easy. There just is not a lot out there!

The behaviors portrayed in the films I mentioned tend to be on the more extreme side but not wholly without some truth.

My other and main point I want to impart however is this: Yes motherhood is hard. It is messy and draining. And as a mother you do in fact, have to, “die to self”. It means, for your child, you consciously set aside your own desires, choices, and hopes – for a time. But the immeasurable gifts you can experience and accept are without a doubt worth it. And this is not just me, or just a sentiment, this is the truth. The truth that Hollywood and the “mainstream media” love to ignore.

“These postpartum thrillers are telling us that to become a mother in a system that doesn’t favor you is to lose control over your life as you once knew it.” (sheknows.com, A. Kelly, 11/7/25)

So to my question at the beginning on nihilism – that “conditions” (motherhood) are so bad as to make “destruction” (rage, contempt, carelessness, distraction) desirable for its “own sake” (good for the woman) independent of any constructive program or “possibility” (sacred connection with your child).”

Is that kind of futility how a lot of the current generation sees motherhood? What are your thoughts on this? I’d love to hear! 

Next Step celebrates motherhood – messiness and all. And will continue to bolster women choosing life with our whole hearts. 

P.S. Lest we forget – paternal PPD is also real, affecting approximately 10% of new fathers. Let’s lift them up in prayer as well. Fathers matter! 

~ Edmund Pellegrino

I recently read an article titled “Fewer medical students trained for abortion procedures” (By Sarah Varney, KFF Health News/March 22, 2022, Kaiser Health News). I can’t even recall how I came across it but it was written just after the overturning of Roe in 2022.  The basic premise was that because of the new (in 2022) abortion restrictions in several states the medical discipline and residency programs who previously offered standardized teaching on abortion “care” were not necessarily continuing to require training of said procedure. 

I decided to dig a little more on this especially in relation to our state, Washington, because well, we are not a state that restricts abortion. I was disappointed, though not wholly surprised, to find that the University of Washington, “Due to the narrowing access to abortion training in other states”, has made the decision to “only admit residents who are committed to providing abortion care”.  That way, this ensures all available spots contribute to training physicians who want to learn and perform abortions in Washington state. And there is no longer an ‘opt out’ box to check. 

“If we live in a state where abortion care is legal, we need to recruit medical students into our program that want to provide abortion care,” said Dr. Alyssa Stephenson-Famy, an associate professor of maternal-fetal medicine at UW. “We should not waste our spots on people not willing to provide abortion.”

“Medicine is a moral enterprise. All are called to lead a moral life and to achieve the holiness of the saints. This obviously means that ethics is important in all professions and walks of life. Yet, we rightly hold physicians and other health care workers to higher standards of professional ethics.” (The Moral Mind, Joseph Meaney,https://www.ncbcenter.org/messages-from-presidents/moralententerprize-3y2rn)

We correctly think of our medical caregivers as engaged in the healing professions. That is why it is a sick perversion of medicine when pressure groups or governments seek to force doctors to become killers. Requiring them (medical students)  to become executioners by performing abortions as part of their training or professional duties is something beyond the pale. Saving “spots” for those willing to engage in murder and refusing those seeking to train in the profession of healing from their calling because they, gasp!stubbornly refuse to learn how to “murder their patients” is appalling. 

Well Next Step is here and here we will remain – our medical staff and volunteers
– stubbornly and wholeheartedly practicing medicine that first, does no harm. 

Pax Tibi Heather Vasquez

P.S. Check out our support site nssupport.org for all things Next Step!

He asked and you all answered. In every way.

On behalf of all of us here at Next Step Pregnancy Services – Thank you! You made this year’s event our most successful in our entire 27 year history! Your support far surpassed anything we could have hoped for. From the bottom of our hearts – thank you.

We promise to continue to provide exceptional care for women, babies, and families. And we pledge to remain a courageous voice for the unborn. Here we are Lord. Send us!

Did you see the beautiful picture of Ari and her baby girl? She and her husband Austin welcomed little Nina earlier this year. We got to meet Nina while she was still in mommy’s womb. 

Earlier this month we had another client come to see our nurse. This client was17 years old and we’ll call her Ana. She came with her mother though mom waited outside at the start. Ana’s boyfriend unfortunately did not accompany her to the appointment. After the initial scan the nurse noted she was measuring 7 weeks and 3 days. Ana stated she had been on birth control pills but “may have skipped some.” Ana’s opening comments were very direct. She stated she wanted an abortion. She’s too young and cannot support a baby. She lacked the uncertainty that most of our clients tend to exhibit

Notably she said her boyfriend does not want her to abort. He is “religious”. He does not want her to have an abortion if “it already has hands and feet and stuff.”
Our nurse patiently went over fetal development and showed her that, in fact, her baby has everything he or she needs to grow into a full human being.
All he or she needs? Time.
Ana and our nurse discussed how an abortion would not just make things “go away” and that she would have to deal with her decision in some capacity. She shared details with Ana of other options, encouragements, and the abundance of resources at her disposal.  After the ultrasound Ana just continued to nod and say “yes”. Our nurse wondered if anything was getting through or was Ana just waiting to make her escape?

This leads me to my ask. What we need more than anything else right now is prayers. Prayers for our nurses who have the massive job of often literally fighting for the life of a child. Talking and convincing and encouraging and guiding – and all the while questioning themselves. Questioning their methods. Speculating on whether or not anything they did or said made a life altering impact or were their words no where near enough. As far as Ana. We don’t know. And most likely will not know. And our nurse has to just keep going. Their many doubts notwithstanding. In the end true faith in Him is all we really have. 

On Saturday September 20th our nurses, Barb, Carrie, and Elizabeth, will be in attendance at our annual Gala dinner. It is a night of celebration, raising funds, and coming together to serve Next Step as Next Step time and time again serves those in need, mother and child, at their most vulnerable. 

We need your support. In every capacity you are able. Prayers. Funds. Supplies. Prayers again. Our nurses need your backing. 

Purchase your tickets here:https://nssupport.org/gala2025/
Early Bird Pricing available until this Friday August 15th.

If you cannot attend but want to ensure our nurses are cared for so they can continue to provide you can do so here and choose Gala Donation
https://nssupport.org/donate/
 

Thank you for you for not only considering support but
turning hope into action.

He knows our every path. He knew it before we even came into being. Our value has never up for debate  ~ for Him. The circumstances of our existence should never have been an argument for our claim to live.  

This brings me to the topic of the unfortunate circumstance of rape. A subject which this year’s Next Step Gala keynote speaker, Rebecca Kiessling, is intimately familiar with. I invite you to watch a very short clip of an interview Rebecca had with Lila Rose, President of Live Action, a global Pro-Life Advocacy Group. 

https://tinyurl.com/liveactionclip

The context of the 33 second clip is Rebecca answering a question put to her by Lila about when she understood the full story of her conception and birth. Conceived through rape, but an abortion ban without exceptions spared her life. It’s a powerful few seconds and I encourage you to find out more about this remarkable woman.
And a beautiful way to do that is to join us at our Gala this year where Rebecca will be sharing her haunting and inspiring story. 

The Gala this year will be on Saturday September 20th at Holy Rosary in Edmonds. Doors open at 5:30pm for a silent auction, drinks, appetizers, our signature NSPS Spritzer, a catered dinner, music, uplifting stories and of course – Rebecca’s stirring share. 

You can register and purchase tickets for this event, choose dinner, and tablemates by clicking the link below. Early Bird tickets until August 15th!

nssupport.org/gala2025

Gala 2025

I look forward to breaking bread with you and celebrating
God’s greatest gift – Life!
~ Heather Vasquez

2025 Gala invitations are in the mail and registration is open! Please join us on Saturday September 20th at the Holy Rosary Pastoral Center in Edmonds for a wonderful evening of friends, fellowship, tasty food, scrumptious desserts, our signature Next Step Spritzer, games, clinic highlights, and an inspiring keynote address by Rebecca Kiessling. It will be, no doubt, a night to remember!

Register, purchase tickets, choose delectable entrees and more at this link

2025 Gala Registration

“That we are all of the same intrinsic worth despite our variability — is a hell of an idea.” ~ Dr. Jordan Peterson

On Tuesday July 1st Senate Republicans passed President Donald Trump’s “Big Beautiful Bill” budget measure, including a provision to defund Planned Parenthood for a year, which pro-life advocates are lauding as a “major step” toward permanently defunding the abortion giant.” (Catholic News Agency Kate Quinones,07/01/2025)

I was, in fact, asked by a few sources what we [Next Step] thought about the bill in regards to the portion about Planned Parenthood.

Jor-El Godsey, President of Heartbeat International, had this to say. “This bill is not about restricting care; it’s about restoring true care. It takes Big Abortion’s heavy thumb off the scales and puts taxpayer dollars to work in places that supports both mother and child. And it’s a call to action for every community to step up, to come alongside, and to ensure that no woman ever feels that abortion is her only option.”

I’d say that is what Next Step thinks about the bill that will remove our tax dollars from Planned Parenthood.

“Pregnancy help is built on compassion, not commerce.”

Our mission is to offer free compassionate care and material goods to women and families before, during, and after pregnancy no matter the circumstances. No matter the circumstances bears repeating.

According to WhiteHouse.gov the bill does not cut Medicaid for those who legitimately rely on it (which would include many of our current clients). The bill does however “eliminate waste, fraud, and abuse.” I am no expert on this but I do know that the care we offer at Next Step Pregnancy Services is essential. And will become more so in the months ahead following this bill, though it still has to go back to the House for a final round of voting. 

Kristin Hawkins, President pf Students for Life, called this bill a “small but important victory”, noting that it “cuts an estimated $500 million from Planned Parenthood and abortion vendors,”.

This leads me to say once again – we offer care no matter the circumstances. Many people who may previously have utilized Planned Parenthood for “care” may be seeking other avenues. And that, my friends, is where we come in. 

Next Step Pregnancy Services, an unapologetically Pro-Life accredited clinic serving thousands of women and families between Seattle and Everett, is in a pivotal position to fill in the gap and be a place of welcome, compassion, and truth. 

The free services we offer – early diagnostic OB ultrasounds, pregnancy testing, STI testing and treatment, abortion pill REVERSAL, reproductive loss grief care, material goods, and soon, cycle charting support – are all essential services, backed by our life-affirming mission.
We stand ready as ever to defend, protect, and celebrate life – no matter the circumstances.

Next Step Pregnancy Services is 100% donor reliant. To be ready for what I know will be a continued rise in women and families coming to us I am asking for your support, your prayers, and your faith. Faith in our small but mighty clinic to continue to act with grace and empathy through service. 

For more on how you can support Next Step’s efforts please visit nssupport.org
Also – please make plans to join us for our annual Gala and Silent Auction Saturday September 20th at the Pastoral Center at Holy Rosary Edmonds. Invitations will be mailed out on July 15th! Be on the look out!

https://nssupport.org/2025/06/17/4973/