Dear friends,
This beloved Tolkien poem, which always hovers close to my heart, came to mind last year when I was pondering expansion of one of our already established services.
If you’ll indulge me;
As I sit beside the fire and think of all that I have seen, of meadow-flower and butterflies in summers that have been;
Of yellow leaves and gossamer in autumns that there were, with morning mist and silver sun and wind upon my hair.
I sit beside the fire and think of how the world will be when winter comes without a spring that I shall ever see.
For still there are so many things that I have never seen: in every wood in every spring there is a different green.
I sit beside the fire and think of people long ago and people who will see a world that I shall never know.
But all the while I sit and think of times there were before, I listen for returning feet and voices at the door.
This beautiful poem reflects on the passage of time, memories of past seasons, the anticipation of the future, and a lingering sense of longing as the speaker waits for a familiar voice and footsteps that may never come again.
Sorrowful as the poem may seem it is also profound in its peacefulness as acceptance settles in the speaker’s heart. And the realization that although death comes for us all, in the end, no matter the circumstances, no matter how small, each loss is singular in its uniqueness and purpose. Each loss is known by God and felt by God.
It put me in mind of the many many times our nurses have encountered active or recent miscarriage, post-abortive, as well as other kinds of reproductive loss during a medical appointment. Both women and men expressing sorrow, confusion, and isolation following a loss.
There are 2.4 million losses annually and up to 60% of those affected experience mental health issues such as anxiety, depression, and PTSD. That’s not a number to be taken lightly.
Back in 2023 our Nurse Manager Barbara became our first medical team member to become certified in Reproductive Loss Grief Care through Life Perspectives/The Institute of Reproductive Grief Care (https://www.reproductivegrief.org/) and it was a definite step in the right direction for us. Because Barb is not a licensed counselor we decided to be intentional about offering what we considered ‘initial care’ for anyone seeking healing and the training and resources Barb obtained, and still works with, via the Institute allowed her to open the door to healing.
Since then we have realized that more and more women and couples were reaching out to us unsure where to turn after a loss. To that end, last year we decided, as a team, to delve deeper into what we could do collectively to serve those men and women.
It took some time and some generous gifts from all of you but we’re there.
Over the next 2-3 months the entire Next Step team will all be engaged in a Clinic Certification for Reproductive Grief Care in collaboration with The Institute of Reproductive Grief Care.
There are courses for our front desk staff, like Marta and Nancy, and a medical track for our nurses, our MD Dr. Stoke as well one for myself, brief as my client contact tends to be. Our hope is for all of us to gain confidence in addressing reproductive loss with empathy, clarity, and love.
In their own words; “The Institute of Reproductive Grief Care focuses on addressing the often-overlooked grief from reproductive loss including miscarriage, abortion, stillbirth, early-infant death, adoption, and infertility. We provide evidence-based education and resources to healthcare professionals, enabling them to deliver compassionate grief care reducing emotional trauma and improving maternal mental health. “
All of us, not just our medical team, engage with both men and women coming through our doors, contacting us over the phone, over email, and through our app. We each require and desire the tools to better serve these families and individuals as they navigate what is ultimately one of the hardest pathways any parent will experience.Recognizing the sacred dignity of every human life from the moment of conception, Next Step honors each loss, no matter the circumstances, offering compassion, comfort, and the hope of Christ to those who grieve.
We are grateful for your continued support of our endeavors and ask for your prayers as we move forward with new insight, renewed energy, and purpose.
